Kind: captions
Language: en
everybody welcome to impact Theory you
were here my friends because you believe
that human potential is nearly limitless
but you know that having potential is
not the same as actually doing something
with it so our goal with this show and
company is to introduce you to the
people and ideas that will help you
actually execute on your dreams
alright today's guest is essentially the
real-life Fresh Prince of bel-air after
being placed in special ed class
becoming very angry and rebellious and
finally narrowly escaping a fate that
saw several of his friends shot and one
of them killed he asked his parents to
send him away without knowing where he'd
end up he found himself stepping off a
plane in Pittsburgh and being welcomed
in by a family friend who lived in one
of the wealthiest public school
districts in the country now the only
black man in the entire school he
discovered that while the context was
different it was just as easy to find
the drugs gangs and destructive behavior
that had sent him packing in the first
place but in this new context with
different expectations the same
behaviors had a very different result
his new and old friends both acted the
same but his old friends were headed to
jail and his new friends were headed to
Yale the realization that merely
changing the context could have such a
dramatic impact on everything he began
to question everything what followed was
a slowly unfolding parade of insights
and self-reflection that would
ultimately see him transform his entire
life from an angry hard-headed
self-identified dumb kid that people
said was closed off to being the founder
of love mob and the self-proclaimed
chief love officer of zone company which
is designed from the ground up to spread
love and connection today he didn't go
to jail or Yale but instead travels the
globe building clean water wells giving
life-changing seminars creating video
content and touching lives wherever he
goes he's also an author with Simon &
Schuster and has written two books love
louder and now or never co-authored by
his wife Alexi Panos please help me in
welcoming the CEO and founder of
motivational messenger and the bridge
method the man that Jack Canfield
best-selling author of Chicken Soup for
the Soul calls unstoppable Preston smile
yeah thank you it's good to have you man
here indeed indeed I was waiting for
that yes I've seen so many of your
videos I'm like if I don't get that
whoo-whoo oh you're gonna get it I'm
gonna give it to you like about seven
fair enough man so I think the coolest
place to start with you
would be to talk about the difference
between facts and stories so how do you
define them and why is that so important
to what you teach people yeah hmm
so we're you're meaning making machines
and it's what we do as humans it's how
we've survived we've made meaning out of
in the bush you know that means
saber-toothed tiger that means dead
right and so we're constantly creating
stories most of the time these stories
are not facts they're facts within our
own consciousness we believe they're
facts but but the truth of the matter is
that they aren't most of it is a
lowercase T and not a capital T and so
for me when I'm supporting people and
coaching people I really hold the mirror
up and remind them that if it can be
grounded in another way then it does not
indeed a fact and more of a story that's
running their lives when you say it can
be grounded in another way what do you
mean so a prime example people will come
and they'll say you know like I want a
date and like yeah I want a guy and I'm
ready for my one but like all the guys
in like LA are like players right as if
this is a fact and and you know it is
done unto you as you believe and so
we're always creating our reality with
our thoughts our thoughts our words and
our actions right and so when we put
emotion behind that and we say it as if
it's definitive then the universe has to
match that so and so it is and so when
people come to me with these types of
scenarios I said well is that actually
effect out of the 12 million people in
Los Angeles
is it a fact that you know that all of
them every single one of them is a
player and in that we can ground it the
other way well no I don't know that but
I went on bumble one time and you know
this guy was this or I was on match.com
and it didn't work interesting so you
gave up early and and this is the funny
thing about us amazing adults is we'll
typically try things about three times
and then give up that's interesting yeah
and kids you know anybody who's ever
seen kids they will try and try and try
and play and fall and and and fall in
love with the process in the journey you
know and so what I'm essentially doing
is redirecting and supporting them and
falling in love with the journey falling
in love with where they need to go
within their own selves to create that
partner that business that whatever it
is that's on their heart so a couple
things you've said in there that I think
are really important I want to dive
deeper so one is the notion that we
create our own reality which i think is
really important for people to
understand and then the other is play
and you talk about play a lot and here
so it started a quest as we got bigger I
started getting really paranoid that I
didn't touch enough people and so I
couldn't get a really good pulse on what
was going on from like the heartbeat of
the community like how everybody in the
company really felt yeah and so I became
obsessed with this notion of soft
metrics and so one of my soft metrics
became laughter yes and it was like the
amount of laughter that I hear I need to
believe that right so if there's a lot
of laughter I can believe that people
are playing they're having a lot of fun
yes which I also believe is so important
to really doing your best and whether
that's because like a child it just
gives you the energy to keep trying and
trying and trying yes or just that it's
fun and so it's good brain chemistry and
you're more likely to you know just keep
being a part a vibrant part of the
community and hearing the times weren't
diminished I needed to trust that as
well and so that that meant that we were
going in the wrong direction so walk me
through like knowing how you talk about
yourself when you were a kid which is
aggressive angry how did you discover
play and have
we put it back into your life how did
you go from being angry to so playful ah
yes I started as the the quantum
powerful happy child that then based on
a set of circumstances which I'm so
grateful for now went down a road you
know took a path and that path led me to
seeking approval outside of myself which
ended me up in a gang and smoking weed
by the time I was eleven and having my
friends be shot and killed and we should
do all kinds of stuff it was crazy and
what's interesting is is a lot of that
for me I attest to not processing the
traumas that I experienced and so the
reason why I'm so playful now is because
I have all this energetic real estate
that's clear you know we teach in the
bridge experience which is my wife and
i's company that the body is a living
library and it stores all the traumas
everything we've ever been through and
so if we never allow ourselves to
process these traumas if we never allow
ourselves I never let the nine-year-old
cry or the 13 year old or the 16 year
old or the 17 year old I never let him
cry I never let him experience the pain
that he was feeling and because of that
it just got stuck in my body
and so by the time I was 17 I was I was
a rageaholic because also because I grew
up in a Western culture where big boys
don't cry and so you talk to man up not
to be a [ __ ] and so for me this was the
way I lived and the question we always
have to ask now is at what cost and for
me at what cost it was at the cost of my
happiness at the cost of my joy at the
cost of my magic and so when I started
the process of diving into the places
that I was most afraid to go into and
and freeing that up it also freed me up
to be more childlike and so for me play
is highly important so I schedule it in
every single day really yes like it's
actually on your calendar in my schedule
that's amazing
to say play yes or do you actually like
put a specific than you my creativity
surfing like I'll just I play with it
but it's in there right it has to happen
well because I know that that's how I
fill my cup and when my cup is four I
can give from the overflow and that
overflow is a beautiful thing it's it's
it's very difficult I've found in my
experience too to give when you don't
have it you know to give and a lot of
people think that if I just keep giving
if I just keep focusing out which is a
beautiful thing if the context of it is
actually service and not you know
wanting to be approved of if I if I keep
giving to everybody else then I'll
finally be good enough if I if I do all
of these things if I go to school and I
get good grades I get good grade so I
can get into a good college and I do the
whole thing so I can finally be good
enough it's this contingency plan that I
found has been what you would call the
American Nightmare that's interesting
mmm-hmm so put a real fine point in that
what is the American Nightmare they when
I do this blank write then later in the
future I will finally have blank write
that contingency my happiness is
contingent on this security worthiness
worthiness is a huge one a lot of people
I find that come to me for coaching
what's under it is is they don't think
they're good enough and so they come to
me I have people who have way more money
than me and they've accomplished more
but they come to me because they know
I'm free because no matter what I have
or don't have I'm all good man alright
this is super random but this is one of
those things that I'm okay so you've
written two books check the books out
they're incredible I'm always fascinated
by where people start their book mm-hmm
and this is how you and your wife
started now or never yes and it's a
quote it's a quote from The Velveteen
Rabbit yes which I was just really
really intrigued now I want to know what
it why this is so meaningful that you
would start the book with it all right
so I'm bear with me I'm going to read
the whole section real isn't how you
were made it's a thing that happens to
you it doesn't happen all at once you
become it takes a long time that's why
it doesn't often happen to people who
break easily or have sharp edges or who
have to be carefully kept generally by
the time you are real most of your hair
has been loved off and your eyes drop
out and you get loose in the joints and
very shabby but these things don't
matter at all because once you were real
you can't be ugly except to those who
don't understand yes yes what does that
mean who gave me the chills yes yes
there's there's there's a lot in there
the short answer would be it's not a
matter of becoming it's a matter of
revealing and this revealing is an
ongoing process the trap of the human is
that we're all trying to land we're
trying to get the job get the girl get
the the house get the thing and then
I'll finally damn let no more problems
it's done I'm good
right and so when when the the Velveteen
Rabbit says is by the time you
experience this your hair has been loved
off and all of these things I think what
they're implying and what we were going
for in this process is that it's it's
it's the in the game learning you know
it's very easy to sit on the sidelines
and talk about life but like to be in
life to be like for instance prime
example my wife and I have we're always
looking for our edges so like what's
what's that what's that thing for me
that's uncomfortable play oh I can get
in there in a minute
right humans I can get in there in a
minute like just instant but my edge
right now is owning that I am a
businessman because I've had this story
that has been well crafted by the media
and everyone else that young black males
that's not what they represent in movies
and TV and all of these other things
right and so for me my edge is 1.7
million in the next 12 months well right
and so to put a number on it yeah and to
see who I become because that's the
that's the thing I'm most excited about
the money it'll come it'll go
can't take it with me fantastic I
already got enough now
I'm already wealthy but it's who I have
to become in order to create that is the
thing I'm most excited about that's
what's gonna get the hair rubbed off of
my Velveteen Rabbit you follow me yeah
yeah yeah that's the far right yes get
started I love I love the energy at the
end because that's how reading that
section I think that's the juice right
is that you got so [ __ ] messy and
into it you just win for it and it's in
that process that while you may be
getting somewhat worn or even like
tattered rice she says you're outright
shabby but you went all in and it's that
concept of you know leaving nothing on
the field and not worrying about and you
talked very eloquently about this but
not worrying about looking pretty and
that's you know one of the diminishers
and we'll get into diminishers a little
bit but like not falling prey to all of
that but instead like really going in
and living an extraordinary life because
you've created that space that you were
talking about earlier where you're
really open to the experiences - you
talk like this is one thing I really
like but we what you do which is you
talk about the the science of what's
happening you talk about the reticular
activating system you talk about so for
those who don't know the reticular
activating system is a part of your
brain that triggers once you decide
something is important you buy a car and
then suddenly you see that car
everywhere yes and you use it in the
example I think very wisely of you get
what you focus on right so if you're
focusing on becoming a businessman
something you're gonna see the answers
popping up everywhere when you focus on
the belief that you can do it suddenly
you're you embody that evidence so it's
really really intriguing so one of the
neatest things that I found in
researching you is how you take because
your ideas are you're able to go
seamlessly from what you've referred to
as woowoo to like immediately applicable
yes and so one of the things I wanted to
do is go through the way that you guys
break down the five steps to basically
build the bridge from where you are to
where you want to be yes in the book Now
or Never
I think these are incredibly powerful
and
through them all but there are five
steps in the book some really
interesting insights number three was
probably my favorite which was act now
yes and you call this the bridge to
breaking the cycle yes you talk about
the comfort zone so you say the comfort
zone is where dreams go to die
yes um how do people by the way in the
book and I should have like brah this is
the first time ever in my life of doing
these interviews and I've done like 200
that I was like gonna bring visual aids
and [ __ ] because you have all these like
really simple but beautiful diagrams yes
in fact I've even turned my phone off
otherwise I would just take my phone
because I took pictures of them yeah
because I thought they were so like
simple and eloquent yes but how do
people so the the image that you had of
of the comfort zone was it showed like
lazy boy yeah like right and then like
this simple path going around the woods
which oh god what did you call the woods
the practice zone or something yes yes
and then you had the castle of
possibility yes and I don't know there
was something in that of seeing like the
the short distance between the lazy boy
and the castle that I found really
interesting so what is that path how do
people get out of their comfort zone and
what awaits them in the castle of
possibilities huh yes so all of us are
on one of those right now all those in
the car zone yes yes and the one that
we're in was probably our dream from
three years ago it's like like nine out
of ten and you've been beasting for you
know probably the last 15 years but nine
out of ten where you're sitting now it
was a dream
four years ago hundred-percent right so
this is this is now the new Netflix and
chill right right but it was the castle
back then this was a really [ __ ] good
point yes so so all of us are sitting in
what was once you know the castle for us
and now it has become the new Netflix
and chill and so stepping out into the
forest where there are mutant you know
like dire wolves and things of that
nature this process is always happening
when we are willing to build our dreams
and so
when I find interesting is that most
people step out they take one hit right
so they declare this is the year that my
business does such-and-such this is the
year that I lose 30 pounds right and
then what tends to happen is it they go
to the gym for the first three months
and then it's raining and then you're
their cousin has a wedding right and
well I'm just gonna go to the wedding
and you know what today is the day I'm
just going to take this weekend off I'm
gonna eat as many doughnuts as possible
like it's all good I'm gonna drink I'm
gonna like it's all good and then they
wake up on that Monday with a hangover
and they say you know what not feeling
good I'm just gonna take this Monday off
and I'm gonna get back on the horse in a
couple days and then a couple of days
come right and it's like well you know I
because I didn't really like go hard on
Monday I really gotta take care of my
emails and then all of a sudden they
find themselves right back on that couch
and so what we were attempting to remind
people of is that the beauty is in the
dance it's it's in the hits a lot of
people want to avoid the hits we want to
avoid any pain and and maximize all the
pleasure and just avoid the pain and for
me this is how I have become me but the
reality is in the force of the unknown
in the testing ground is what we call it
in the testing ground this is where all
of the magic happens because what's
going to happen is you're going to get
to the castle we always do right and
sometimes and I know you've seen this we
get to the castle and we put our ladder
up and we're about to climb up and we
realize that we had it up against a wall
that was never our choosing and so
whether it was your choosing or it
wasn't when you get there you're gonna
celebrate yes new house new business new
girl new guy yes got the thing got the
thing
everybody's pumped everybody's happy
everybody's excited
now what Newcastle right and we're back
at it again
so so if if you understand that no
matter where you land once we hit the
1.7 million in 12 months all we're gonna
do is declare a new vision because
that's the process that's what it means
to be human and so for us it's it's a
reminder that you're never gonna land
there's never gonna be a time where
you're like yep I'm done and we find and
most people know this that there's so
many statistics that say then within
five years of someone retiring that they
usually die because once you don't feel
like you have a purpose what else is
there makes sense then you talk about
one of your the five steps which is own
who you are you were just talking about
that I'm really glad that you brought
that story up of where the world is
telling you that you need to be a
motivational speaker yes and so I read
that part in your book after I've
discovered who you really are right so
I've spent hours watching the videos
where you're you and it's you know about
love and just big and energetic and I
thought I never occurred to me like how
sort of left or right of the the norm
for a motivational speaker that really
is until you set it and then you tell
the story about how you're you know
hanging with your friends there's a
certain dress code between you and your
friends you go off to college and you
come back and like what you say like
fuchsia skinny jeans I don't like
lightening converses ah yeah and I was
like wow I can totally see you becoming
who you really are but then colliding
with that world that has all these they
have a box and they're trying to fit you
back into that box yes and you teach
people to break out of that box
absolutely so what how does one own
themselves which i think is to your
point maybe one of the most damaging
things that happens to people they never
do that yes yeah start with an
acceptance that's where that's where
because it's it's very difficult to
quote-unquote find oneself be please
forever evolving right but it's very
difficult if you are judging yourself if
if you're punishing yourself and so for
me the first place to start would be
acceptance like what is here ah okay
what's in my bank account what's in my
emotional bank account what's happening
with my family all of this I created
wow I'm that powerful and I accept this
I see it okay perfect taking taking a
stock of what one has created in their
lives and just accepting it and then go
into a process of letting go of the idea
that it could have been any better you
know that's that's the thing is we get
somewhere we go oh I should have done
this and I should have done that and I
should have done that and it should
themselves to death and so I'm
constantly bringing us back in myself
back to reminder that I did the best I
could with the tools and consciousness I
had available at the time and so what
I'm experiencing at this now moment is
absolutely perfect why because I still
have breath I still am in the game good
bad ugly whatever you'd like to call it
I'm here and there's so many people that
didn't wake up this morning and so for
me it's a reminder of accepting what is
and then letting go of what could have
been and then deciding and declaring
what I'm excited about right following
one's highest excitement what would it
be excited what would make me excited to
wake up in the morning you know and and
being in the inquiry because powerful
questions always call for powerful
answers and so you know if I'm asking
myself disempowering questions then I'm
Google God whatever you would like to
call it can only bring back that it's
the same thing and so if I'm asking
myself you know what would be exciting
for me to do and give in this lifetime
and then I just sit in the stillness
this is another part of it is is
stillness we've become a society that
that mu is moving so fast that there's
no space for the universe to speak
through and as us and so I slow down to
the speed of wisdom and allow it to hit
allow it to take me you know we're
always receiving pings and taps on the
shoulders and things of this nature but
a lot of us there's so much white noise
because we're moving so fast I slowed
down to the speed of wisdom that's
[ __ ] good man I've never heard that
before I like that a lot so talk to me a
little bit about you talk about
self-compassion you talk about self
forgiveness which I found really
interesting in your book and you almost
always include that like it'll be you
need to forgive other people oh and by
the way yourself yes
what is the emotional trap that people
get into that stops them from doing that
and is there a procedure other than
asking better questions which by the way
I really hope people heard what you were
just saying about asking better better
questions yes but is there a process
that they can go through that's gonna
help them out cuz I think a lot of
people are stuck there a lot and they
get stuck there for decades yes yes as
pertaining to forgiving oneself or yes
forgiving yourself there's many ways
right I am of a school that there is no
one-size-fits-all but what I will say is
I have my clients start with writing up
a list of 50 amazing things that they've
done and after they get the list of 50 I
have them actually stop and on for 50
days each one of those things just
stopped and meditated for 10 to 15
minutes and feel into it like that thing
that I did when I was 19 where that
person was almost gonna get hit by a car
and I pushed him out of the way or
whatever the case may be what a
beautiful thing I did and just begin to
fall in love with themselves another
thing that I really reminding my clients
to do is dance because literally did yes
literally dance put on a song something
that that like you know everybody has a
song everybody has something that you
hear that joint and you're going for it
right so put on a song that really like
bring some emotion out and dance right
dance themselves clean because
there are some schools of psychology
that think that you need to go all the
way into you know what happened when you
were seven and things of this nature and
there are other schools of thought that
say if you just keep filling your cup if
you just keep having more and more fun
and enjoying the magic of life what will
happen is yourselves everything will
match that and so there are many ways to
go about this but the overall gist is
falling in love falling in love starting
to become a happy scientist of oneself
and bringing a deep awareness to when
you are experiencing joy right and being
purposeful I have my clients set three
alarms and three times a day the alarm
goes up it's called a joy alarm and when
that alarm goes off no matter what is
happening I have them put everything
down I don't care if you're in the
middle of a meeting
you step out guys I have to go in the
bathroom is just great and just what
does it feel like to be freaking alive
whoa do you have an anchor it to
something something that is you know
that they're really grateful for or
joyful about or yes but that's it's it's
dependent on the client so yes but I
sometimes that's not necessary though
like without a case by case yes exactly
so when I first started doing I didn't
anchor it to anything other than all
needs met right now like what would it
feel like if I'm leaned into all needs
met right now and is that to acknowledge
that all needs really are med you've got
breath to date lungs like that kind of
thing yes because they are that's the
thing that is this illusion that we have
to have the next paycheck or the next
whatever in order to actually have our
needs met but they they are like I've
been in the middle of India where there
are there is no water or food and even
them they experience joy I've been to
parts of and I've done it for the last
four years in a row with my wife's
organization parts of Africa in Tanzania
where they don't have anything but yet
they have everything because they lived
from all needs met
even though
they're getting their water from
basically a giant hole that they dug
with cow poop and stuff in it here's a
question that's always been interesting
to me so do you think that that they
also struggle like they have their own
version of the tanzanian nightmare
emotionally right obviously the beyond
the physical stuff yes like is it do
they fall prey to different mental traps
is it the same mental traps yes I think
that you can avoid that I think that
more easily by being in that kind of
situation or like so I think one one
thing I would be very interested I've
never worked in that kind of condition
so I have no first-person insights yes
but having worked in the inner cities
here yeah one thing that I find really
interesting is that everyone falls prey
to the same [ __ ] it's just on a
different like financial scale but it's
it is the same right yes but you do get
certain things that are unique to a
circumstance so I'll say that the frame
of reference in the inner cities is so
weird yeah that that is what planted the
seed me that has become impact Theory
it's understanding that no one is ever
going to intentionally give them an
empowering mindset yes so it has to be
created around them without them having
to do anything for it
so when you go to Tanzania and you
experience the like you told the story
of a little girl forgive me I forget her
name but endo loop end oh yes okay so
she's got a skin disease and sore entire
face is bandaged one eye but she's still
singing yes and in that moment you
realize whoa like all needs are met like
their real joy emanating from this child
that's infecting everybody is incredible
but I've got to imagine that a she has
her bad days as well and that everybody
in the village well they also have
sparks of joy yes that are born despite
where they are
yes but I'm guessing that there are some
they have some are the traps Universal
are they not like what does that look
like yes I would say that the degree
from which because like for instance in
Tanzania particularly in the bush where
we go there are no billboards there are
there's nothing telling them that
they're not pretty enough that they're
kinky
hair isn't is nappy and they need to
straighten it there's nothing there
they're not seeing images of the white
Jesus that says oh this is good this is
good this is good and you don't look
like that so now you need to right right
so they they don't they're not being
programmed to keep up with the Joneses
so no it's not that but they definitely
have their thing everywhere does you
know we travel to Australia every single
year and that tall poppy syndrome is
real in Australia tall poppy syndrome
what's that so it is basically a
consciousness because Australia was a
convict places where England pushed all
their convicts this idea that the
tallest poppy is the one that gets
chopped down and so you keep yourself
sort of level with everyone else and
nobody wants to be 2/6 fest successful
or too boisterous or big because you
will be chopped down by everybody in
your community and so that is actually a
thing it doesn't show up in the US it's
the exact opposite you know you have a
Mercedes and live in a freakin live with
your mom right because you want to
pretend like you're better than everyone
else and so every place has its own
thing you know we just I just got back
from London England and their thing is
the stiff upper lip right don't talk to
me I'm do I'm taking care of myself
right now you know it's like right and
all of those things don't work they
don't work and so Tanzania yes
everywhere everywhere has a thing the
degree from which they are receiving
Western influence has a big part of it
for me in my experience so because
they're not you know being bombarded
with imagery that tells them that
they're not good enough its community is
still probably number one on the list so
it's everybody's outside their house is
that everything way the way it's built
is family all family if your kids acting
up I can punish your kid I don't have to
you know I won't get sued or whatever
the case may be so it's interesting how
do they react when you come in and
you're building wells and are they
trying to learn so that they can be
self-sufficient are they just yes so
used to people coming in
this is a big deal most organizations
come in and this that that would be for
me as an outsider who's really an
insider that would be the biggest issue
that Tanzania and lots of Africa
experiences is the the hand out thing
it's kept them from realizing their own
Kingdom and queendom and because it's
been set up that way
my wife's organization with her partner
Taniya l'amour the way they do it is we
go and we lived there and we spend time
with them and they the community must
build and help and contribute money it's
not just wazoo which means a foreigner
coming in and giving money it's all
we're doing this together and because
they've been doing it for 12 years in
the same country you know we go back and
I know these people by name they know me
they know they know my family like it's
it's a beautiful thing so it's
incredible man so talk to me you give
away 80% of your stuff you are
intentionally homeless yes what is the
goal to have fun to see you see what
happens to be minimalist what's success
to us well being able to have fun make
love travel all over the world support
people reminding them of their truth
you've said freedom is a mindset yes
which I'm guessing now I know what you
mean by that but what do you mean by
that what would be your guess well
hearing the travel and going where you
want to go and being able to decide when
you go being your own boss like not
having anybody tell you when and where
to be yes
I'm guessing that's that's that for me
but I don't I don't think or think that
I'm doing it the right way right so I've
found many people who that's not high on
their priorities list traveling and all
of that stuff so my mom for example can
and has found freedom and being retired
and so the freedom mindset is just
realizing that you're already wealthy
right where you are
most of the people who are watching this
video right now
have a cellphone maybe a computer house
food in their refrigerator nine to ten
they have a job and if they don't they
could get one they can hustle they can
figure it out
that's pretty damn wealthy but yet and
still there are some watching this right
now who believe they don't have it and
they came to get the answers and for me
that's already an issue it's one of the
things that I do my best to remind
people of is that there is no and even
though any video I put out that says
seven steps to or five steps to those
are the ones that everybody's loving
because they want the answer how can I
skip the force of the unknown get to the
castle and finally be good enough right
but this is a lie and so I I'm
constantly reminding the people who
watch my stuff that I'm I'm in the
process too it's important that I remind
people that we're all nobody has the
answer we're all in the unfolding we're
all trying to figure it out everybody's
got issues and that no matter where you
go in the planet all right I cannot let
you leave without asking about
everything is neutral is so intriguing
what do you mean by everything is
neutral yes so we believe that all of
all events are neutral until we give
them a meaning and a story and so going
broke neutral neutral yeah until until
we add a story to it I have two clients
right now
one who has just beat cancer and one who
just found out that she has like Stage
four and one of the things that's really
interesting about this and I'm gonna use
cancer as a an example some people find
out that they have cancer or they're
experiencing cancer and they go I'm dead
my life's over
right it's it was a neutral event until
they added the story called my life is
over
some people hear that they have cancer
and they go game on game
I'm about to take my life back and take
it to a whole nother level cancer won't
beat me it's the same diagnosis but two
different come from and so for me this
is still a neutral event until we we
make it mean something I've had an
experience some of the lowest lows and
all of it was neutral until I made it
mean that I wasn't good enough or smart
enough or pretty enough or whatever
enough I want to put on it
you follow oh yes yeah no I love that I
think it's really important for people
to hear that and you've taken it to some
pretty extreme Zand examples that you've
given I think to really let people know
how serious you are about that yeah it's
really really intriguing all right
unfortunately we are near the end here
where can people find you online at
Preston smiles on everything or Preston
smiles calm perfect all right my final
question mm-hmm
what is the impact that you want to have
on the world I want to remind people of
love that love is all there is was and
ever will be that love is our true
essence it's our gift it's it's what we
came here to emanate it's what we're
breathing love is in every fiber of our
being and everything that we perceive
inwardly and outwardly nice it's
beautiful man yeah thank you so much for
coming on the show with you guys you've
got an entire universe to dive into with
this man and I promise one thing it will
be very high-energy it will be insanely
eloquent it will draw you in and it will
change you if you let it when you hear
this guy's story and the things that
he's gone through and the transformation
that he's put himself through and you
realize that he started as dyslexic but
you just heard him talk and he would
watch TV and he would get better at his
vocabulary and he would realize what the
things were that he wanted to get good
at and he would go after them
relentlessly pursuing it and really that
friction that I was talking about
earlier between the the wonderment that
is love being all things and the reality
of the reticular activating system and
knowing that you need goals and that
goals are [ __ ] like that friction is
where he lives and where he generates
these amazing ideas that are really
going to help you because they're gonna
ring so true
you'll something will feel right and
then he can explain why it feels right
and that's where it gets interesting
because he's no longer even though he's
in many ways talking about faith he's
not asking you to take it on faith and
that my friends is what makes Preston
smiles a true original and somebody
that's really really gonna help you if
you let it so dive in my friends check
it out and remember that there's a
weekly show so if you haven't already be
sure to subscribe and until next time my
friends be legendary thank you guys so
much for watching and if you haven't
already be sure to subscribe and for
exclusive content be sure to sign up for
our newsletter all of that stuff helps
us get even more amazing guests on the
show and helps us continue to build this
community which at the end of the day is
all we care about so thank you guys so
much for being a part of the impact 3
community
[Music]